What to say if someone at school calls you a nerd
It has come to my attention that there are people in this world who do not know that nerds have inherited the earth. These children may call their classmates nerds and intend it to be an insult. This is wrong.
So if someone at school calls you a nerd, here are some examples of how to respond:
- I’m a nerd, you’re a turd. Which is better?
- Yeah, and?
- Have you only just noticed?
- Actually I’m a geek but thank you for the compliment.
- You’ll be working for me one day so please remember that I like my burger well done.
- Thank you! For a second I thought I was a bit like you!
- I’d rather be a nerd than a jerk any day
- At least the brain store was open when I went there
- Phew! Thank god! At least I won’t end up on the Jeremy Kyle show when I’m older, unlike you.
- Great, so I’m just like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs and Doctor Who combined.
- Yes I know. State the obvious, why don’t you?
- Wow! A retro insult! Are you having a 1970’s theme day or something?
- I’m going to tell my nerdy mother you said that, and she’s going to bop you on the head with her BEST SELLING BOOK
Or best of all, just ignore it and walk away. Don’t give headspace to bullies, they don’t deserve it.
Thanks to my friends on Twitter for input on this. Nerds unite, geeks always prosper.
From one nerd to another