What to say if someone at school calls you a nerd

It has come to my attention that there are people in this world who do not know that nerds have inherited the earth. These children may call their classmates nerds and intend it to be an insult. This is wrong.

So if someone at school calls you a nerd, here are some examples of how to respond:

  • I’m a nerd, you’re a turd. Which is better?
  • Yeah, and?
  • Have you only just noticed?
  • Actually I’m a geek but thank you for the compliment.
  • You’ll be working for me one day so please remember that I like my burger well done.
  • Thank you! For a second I thought I was a bit like you!
  • I’d rather be a nerd than a jerk any day
  • At least the brain store was open when I went there
  • Phew! Thank god! At least I won’t end up on the Jeremy Kyle show when I’m older, unlike you.
  • Great, so I’m just like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs and Doctor Who combined.
  • Yes I know. State the obvious, why don’t you?
  • Wow! A retro insult! Are you having a 1970’s theme day or something?
  • I’m going to tell my nerdy mother you said that, and she’s going to bop you on the head with her BEST SELLING BOOK

Or best of all, just ignore it and walk away. Don’t give headspace to bullies, they don’t deserve it.

Thanks to my friends on Twitter for input on this. Nerds unite, geeks always prosper.

From one nerd to another

February 6, 2012. Tags: , . Rants, Top Tips.


  1. Kate Takes 5 replied:


  2. actuallymummy replied:

    Oh good lord is that the kind of slick comeback you need in school now? I would never have survived. Hope my kids learn to be that quick-witted. Ah, now I get it – they’re practicing on me!

  3. Anya from Older Single Mum replied:

    Priceless. Thank you!

  4. jae replied:

    Thank you all for your comments! Much appreciated

  5. slightlysuburbandad replied:

    Nerds rock! Mind you, as I work for a software company and my wife is a Star Trek addict I would say that….

  6. Vote El! (And also Jae!) « Eljae – A blog by El and Jae replied:

    […] explained what to do if someone calls you a nerd, what it means when kids use text speak and why homework should be […]

  7. Macy replied:

    Well said great come backs love them

  8. Our greatest hits – packed with nutritious goodness « Eljae – A blog by El and Jae replied:

    […] also likes the post about What to say if someone at school calls you a nerd because it’s good […]

  9. Random post of the week 2-1-2013 « Exploratory Technology 104 replied:

    […] this is RANDOM to the max… if you ansk me.  ”So if someone at school calls you a nerd, here are some […]

  10. Devil.angel.Pm replied:

    you can also say “Im not a nerd, Im just smarter than you”

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